Marriage , which was once considered a must in Korean Society, has become an option. Let's see how the HIT members think about the trend itself.
I'm opposed to the atmosphere of our society that discriminates against people who decided not to marry. Often, people who are single above a certain age ―which is considered the right age to get married ― are easily viewed as though they failed to get married, regardless of their circumstances. They are also blamed as the main reason of the low birth rate these days. However, it is not true and i tis hard for them to fight against prejudiced people in society. All people should be respected for their choices. Therefore, single people deserve respect, too.
If someone asks me why the younger generation refuses to get married and remains single, I will answer as follows: we are merely refusing to burden ourselves. I do not blame ‘marriage’ for the situation, because the pure definition of marriage is two lovers promising to be a life companion of one another, which I think is beautiful. However, too many impurities masked as social conventions cloud the true meaning of marriage. Our society just requires too much to become a married woman or to become a mother. As for me, I strongly doubt myself raising a family, because I am not that much of a self-giving woman compared to ‘a mother’ as our society suggests.
Consider the following conditions which you have already witnessed : the unbalanced domestic division of labor, the one-sided parenting, a subordination to the family of husband and many other oppressions. Since the oppression and exploitation of the patriarchy has been spread in our society, a marriage can be described as a steep hill rather than a blessing. However, if we break the frame of patriarchy and gain equality of (social) gender, we can realize a peer marriage in which the partners agree to an equal division of all aspects of the marriage.
I take a neutral stance on celibacy. In fact, I purely see it as a matter of one's choice. If you want to settle down and start a family, so be it. And if you wish to remain single for the rest of your life, go ahead. I find it funny how some people actually decide on whether they will get married or not by just listening to the people around them. I mean, seriously? Are you still living your life like in the medieval ages? It's our lives, not theirs, after all.
For me, marriage is just a matter of choice. Someone who values one's own life, individuality and freedom, will choose not to marry. He/She will spend time and money for themselves and enjoying living alone or with his/her lover. Yet, I think, he/she can feel the loneliness or emptiness as they get older and older. On the other hand, someone who hopes for a family, a strong union or close group with children will prefer marriage. He/She may have some trouble adjusting to their partner or have a hard time raising children. Despite these hardships, I guess, he/she will get a whole ally who supports him/her entirely. This will be such a big comfort and energy for one to live a tough life. So to say, it is a different way of living a life, depending on one's style.
Choi Areum email@example.com
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